Tag Archives: Finland

A hunger to know who we are and from where we have come

Alex Haley’s 1976 classic: Roots: The Saga of an American Family

When I wrote my book about the U.S. adoption system and experience, I felt I had an almost moral duty to acknowledge the profound wisdom shared by the great African American writer Alex Haley.

Haley’s two great works, The Autobiography of Malcolm X (1965) and Roots: The Saga of American Family (1976), stand out in the pantheon of American letters. I connected to both for different reasons, but I was more personally drawn to his family story in what most people today call Roots. For an entire generation of Americans and people like me who came of age when it was published, it helped to shed light on the U.S. slavery system that erased the past identities of millions.

For me, Roots is also deeply universal.

Haley’s family’s story from west Africa to the horror of the Middle Passage and chattel slavery and then to freedom is one of the most important historical and creative works in our collective American experience. It also speaks to me because he captures the essential truth of finding life’s meaning: answering the siren call to our most important question: “Who am I?”

Haley explored this life question in the boldest of fashions, weaving together a story of American violence and the history of enslaved Africans who were Haley’s ancestors, brought to what became the United States in the New World. Telling this story, however, was not easy. It nearly killed the author.

Haley described to NPR in an interview in February 1977 how he also communed with his ancestors on a cargo vessel, traveling from Liberia to the Florida. He almost committed suicide on that trip, coming close to jumping off the ship’s bridge amid a wave of depression and uncertainty. Instead he found a way to make a personal connection to the horrific Middle Passage, which describes the slave trade and its human cargo from West Africa to the Americas and the Caribbean. Haley heard the voices of his family ghosts, and he broke down in tears when he made that breakthrough.

All of us can thank those ancestors who visited with Haley that painful night in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, when he hit the pit of his own despair and cried from his soul. What he left all of us has touched generations of readers, including me.

Paying homage to Haley in my memoir

In 2018 I published my own “family” saga, searching for my hidden past, in my memoir and public health history of adoption called You Don’t Know How Lucky You Are. In chapter six on my book, under the chapter title “Blood is Thicker than Water,” I wrote:

Photographer Mickey Adair, used under a CC 3.0 license

“Haley achieved international fame for documenting his long and successful family search that stretched back to his ancestral villages in Gambia, in West Africa. Haley eloquently describes why his own search mattered, particularly for many African Americans whose histories and families were cruelly severed by slavery. It was an institution that separated them from their homeland and then children from their families in the Americas. ‘In all of us there is a hunger, marrow-deep, to know our heritage—to know who we are and where we have come from,’ writes Haley. “Without this enriching knowledge, there is a hollow yearning. No matter what our attainments in life, there is still a vacuum, an emptiness, and the most disquieting loneliness.’” 

I have clear and sharp memories watching the TV series Roots. It made me confront many ugly truths about my country and also my hidden past as an adoptee. I never talked publicly about my thoughts then. But the seed grew and matured. I never, ever doubted the truth of what this inner voice was saying—exactly the way Haley described it.

I am not the only one to have been touched by Haley’s work and his universal story of what it means to be a human being. Today, Roots has been published in 37 languages.

And like Haley, my journey in life as an adoptee robbed of his past and kin connections demanded that I confront that vacuum and disquieting loneliness, if it took all my life to do that.

Each chapter of my life has had different ways of confronting this feeling, and soon I will be taking a much-anticipated and long-awaited journey. It is time.

Reminders of Haley’s universal truths today

As I have drawn closer to my more than two-decades delayed trip one of my ancestral home countries, Finland, I was reminded about what Haley shared in his work and in his many interviews about his family’s story.

After some failed starts using a biological family tree of my U.S. biological relatives and good old Google, I finally connected with very distal biological kin in Finland.

It was part luck, part detective work, and part “sisu,” which means stoic determination and grit to overcome adversity in the Finnish language. With my new-found Finnish kin, our shared bloodlines and history can be traced back to small villages in the Finnish administrative regions of Ostrobothnia and South Ostrobothnia, when Finland was under the control of the Swedish Empire in the late 1700s.

My ancestors and those of my Finnish relatives trace back to the village of Kortesjärvi, in South Ostrobothnia, Finland.

Since the first “family email” arrived from Finland this month, I have connected with a couple of my distant relatives. We are now planning to meet for an impromptu gathering with other relatives spread out around the country when I arrive there. (Details are still being worked out.)

One of my relatives wrote me that I even resembled two sons they have: “This is such an exciting possibility to learn more of our family history. It is also heartwarming to think that it may be possible to see you.” Even before reading this line, some of my Finnish-American biological relatives told me that many of my biological relatives always thought I resembled my great grandmother, who was born in Finland and emigrated to the United States to northern Michigan in the early 1900s. (Two of my biological relatives told me that: a biological cousin, and only recently, as well as another more distant family relative who I just connected with for the first time ever this year.)

None of this is a surprise, and yet it is profoundly visceral. It is hard to describe this to others, except for me to repeat what Haley shared so absolutely perfectly.

After my Finnish relatives and I connected, I have been sharing regularly a line on social media that I have been sharing for years: “Blood is thicker than water.” I have never, ever doubted this truth. My trip, literally “going home” to the old ancestral villages of Finland, is nothing more than proof of this knowledge of what it means to be connected and to be human.

Talking way too much with ‘Adoption: The Making of Me,’ and it was fun!

When I was invited to be guest on the adoptee-centered podcast Adoption: The Making of Me, produced and published by podcasters and producers Louise Browne and Sarah Reinhardt, I expected this to be something new for me.

Outside of what I have published in my adoptee memoir, I refrain publicly from talking about my backstory with my biological mother, my family life before I left home at the age 18, and issues that I don’t share when discussing adoption legislative reform and adoptee rights advocacy.

This time, I knew it would be different, and it seemed OK.

(If you prefer, you can listen to the podcast here, on Apple Podcasts.)

Browne and Reinhardt asked me to talk about topics I mostly keep private. So I did. I highlighted issues such the very bad domestic abuse in my adoptive family, which I have written about before. I also discussed other issues growing up I mostly keep private, as I focus more on legislative and upstream reforms to end the inequities of this system. 

Hopefully this conversation may help some others, which is why it seemed right to do this. Within hours of it being published I received a comment from a fellow adoptee using words to describe my experience that I never use to this day describing my life as an adoptee or my life story. That is fine, because each of us can experience a story with our own points of view.

Some of the other issues we covered include the denial of equal legal rights to domestic adoptees in my birth state Michigan and other states. I also talked about the history of my birthplace, the long-closed adoption mill and maternity hospital in Detroit called Crittenton General Hospital. I even was able to discuss my Finnish heritage and provide comparisons of the United States to Finland, homeland to my maternal great grandparents on my mother’s family side. As we closed, I managed to sneak in a few quick facts–because I love facts!–that the Finnish government and its national health service supports mothers and kids, making adoption in Finland rare and almost nonexistent.

As we nearly completed our hour-long conversation, I painfully realized I did too much of the talking without enough time for conversation, and they graciously forgave this sin.

I really appreciated the wonderful talk and these two podcasters, who are doing a brilliant job allowing adopted persons to tell stories to help others understand the adoption experience, from the point of view by those who lived it and who are the experts. You can also catch copies of their podcasts on their YouTube channel. Visit their past interviews to listen and learn from the voices of those who know this issue in the marrow of their bones.

Thanks again, ladies!

Counting adoptions and not counting adoptions: a tale of two countries

Adoptions in Finland since 1987; source: Statistics Finland

Finland’s national agency tracking the country’s health and other data, called Statistics Finland, provides complete, accurate data on all adoptions in Finland. The Nordic country had less than 300 in 2020.

So here we have, again, another country that has mandated the counting of all adoptions–the way public health systems should work in modern countries, when those countries have functional national health systems.

The United States, by comparison, does not have such a system. In fact, it has a fractured national and state and local health public health systems in terms of coordination and funding and in addressing population health issues.

In addition, adoptions outside of intercountry adoption are not tracked in the United States as an explicitly desired outcome by the U.S. adoption system to hide its massive impact on our country, our residents, and even our collective population health.

We are lousy, and the way to fail at every step to be a functional nation is glaringly obvious again through adoption data and a simple country-to-country comparison.

Oh, by the way, Finland barely has any adoptions, and the numbers are actually dropping in recent years. Kudos, Finland, for a job well done!

Finland also has a robust national health system, and they are healthier and live longer than we do in the USA. I could go on, but I’ll stop there. I’m exhausted already.

Kinship and ethnic ancestries matter in our bones

Every one of us is connected in a web of ancestral ties, to those who came before us, though U.S. adopted persons are denied the knowledge of these ties by regressive laws in most states.

During the last two months, I have had some profoundly memorable conversations with my friend. He is an adoptee like me who discovered his maternal kin and ancestry later in life as an adult.

Like me, my friend was denied his true vital records and kinship information by law. In his case, Washington state denied him equal treatment by law in accessing his original vital records. Despite laws denying him absolutely vital information about who he is and from whence he came, he was able to find his family by perseverance and hard work.

Only this weekend, after we talked our family histories and DNA search tools in greater depth, did I make an important realization about his kinship and ethnic ties to his Jewish ancestors in Europe. He acknowledged that his Jewish heritage to kin that once lived in Europe means he had distal kin and ancestors who were murdered in the Holocaust. It is a heavy load to carry.

Then it dawned on me how important this is for him.

Auschwitz escapee, hero, and humanitarian, Rudolf Vrba

He was intensely interested in the amazing and true story of Auschwitz survivor and escapee Rudolf Vrba, who published a memoir of his feats in 1963 called “I Escaped from Auschwitz.”

I had told him about the book and shared with him an essay I wrote and published about Vrba and fellow escapee Alfred Wetzler in late December 2022. He then listened to an audiobook recording of Vrba famous co-written memoir, with Irish journalist Alan Bestic, and expressed profound awe of Vrba’s heroism and success alerting the world about the Auschwitz-Birkenau death camp. That warning ultimately saved the lives of 200,000 Hungarian Jews.

Last weekend we talked more about what being an American distal relative means to someone with Jewish ancestors.

He clearly knows this means that European kin of their shared Jewish ancestors were murdered by Nazis in the Holocaust, which claimed up to 6 million Jewish civilian lives alone.

I then told him about my trip to Poland in July 2000, when I was working on my Holocaust and Nazi concentration and death camp photo project. My friend solemnly acknowledged his roots likely lie in a shtetl somewhere in Europe, and that the fate of those there likely ended in World War II, probably in one of the Nazi death camps built in Poland. (See this powerful 1996 PBS Frontline documentary on the fate of Jewish civilians in just one historic shtetl, Bransk.)

Contact sheet showing the desecrated synagogue in the shtetl/town of Cieszanów, Poland (2000)

My friend appreciated my story visiting one of the long-gone shtetls in Poland, the small village of Cieszanów, Poland. While the town remains, the Jewish inhabitants do not. I travelled there with a Polish Holocaust tour guide and a fellow American, on our day-long trip to the former death camps of Sobibor and Belzec, which were two of the three death camps in eastern modern-day Poland where Nazis killed approximately 600,000 civilians, most Jews.

On our short visit to this small Jewish town, we visited the long-desecrated synagogue. It was already in terrible condition in July 2000, and Google shows it looks worse today. My fellow American traveler that day lit a candle in the overgrown former Jewish cemetery close by, in honor of some friends, whose family could trace their origins to this community.

What is painful to me as an adoptee is knowing my friend was denied knowledge of his likely blood-kinship ties to places like this in Europe. The state of Washington did not help him—in fact, they still deny all adoptees equal rights to their vital records, and thus their ability to know where they trace their lineage, kin ties, ethnicity, and vital ancestral stories.

This is one of the more horrible cruelties of this system as it exists today in the United States, with a patchwork of mostly discriminatory laws denying millions of persons their family history, medical history, kin relations, and ethnic identity as a matter of law.

As an adoptee rights advocate for years, I have long argued that all of us, every single one of us, everywhere in the world, regardless of the systems that brought us into the world, have an inherent human right to know who we are and from whence we come. Global systems like adoption, which are still beloved by many, including many on the “progressive” political spectrum today in the United States, deny this and perpetuate harm to generations now

My hidden and severed kin ties to Finland

Finnish-American timber workers, date unknown (courtesy of the Library of Congress)

I write about this issue in my book, particularly how I discovered my ethnic identity linked to Wales and England and also to Finland on my birth mother’s side after I was 24 years old.

These stories, as I could tell from my friend, matter in our bones. And I felt a special privilege that I could let him know I was once able to visit a shtetl for others, when he may not get that chance.

In my book, I paid homage to celebrated African American author Alex Haley,  author of Roots. The celebrated and pathbreaking novel details the history of his family and their journey from a village in Africa, to chattel slavery for generations, and to eventual freedom. Haley’s words describe why these ties matter that we can feel in our bones. “In all of us there is a hunger, marrow-deep, to know our heritage—to know who we are and where we have come from…Without this enriching knowledge, there is a hollow yearning. No matter what our attainments in life, there is still a vacuum, an emptiness, and the most disquieting loneliness.”

During my conversations with my fellow adoptee friend, I shared my story about my Finnish ancestral ties.

My biological maternal grandmother is Finnish American, born in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, where many Finnish immigrants to the United States arrived at the end of the 19th century and beginning of the 20th century.

According to the U.S. Library of Congress, the 1920 Census again showed that Michigan and Minnesota were home to the largest numbers of Finnish-Americans, with about one-third of the total U.S. population born in Finland evenly divided between each state.  I’m a descendant of this group who settled in the Upper Peninsula to do unpleasant things like timber harvesting and iron ore mining, and maybe some fishing on the side. No wonder my grandmother left there at an early age.

Since finding out I had at least one-quarter Finnish ancestry, I have celebrated my Finnish roots.

“Kullervo Departs for the War,” by Akseli Gallen-Kallela (1901), from the Ateneum Art Museum

For the past few years, I’ve been honoring Kalevala Day, a national holiday in Finland celebrated each year on February 28. The day honors the national long-form epic poem called the Kalevala that was  published in 1849 (as the “New Kalevala” compared to the earlier “Old Kalevala”) by the folklorist Elias Lönnrot.

Working as a doctor in rural areas, Lönnrot for years travelled widely in rural areas of Finland and the Karelian region collecting folk poetry that was usually sung, similar to epic poems of other cultures historically. The stories and poems are part of the Arctic region’s rich oral tradition, passed down in Balto-Finnic languages for at least two millennia.

I recently found an English translation on Project Gutenberg. I also just started reading the Old Kalevala, and I am enjoying it. The Kalevala is a type of storytelling so unlike Western traditions, and full of earthy descriptions that touch on many senses. Here is a small sampling of the story and a description of Lemminkainen, one of the poem’s main hero characters:

The Old Kalevala, a collection of folk stories and poems that preceded the publication of the Kalevala

Straightway Lemminkainen journeyed
With the maidens to the castle;
There he sang and conjured pitchers
On the borders of the tables,
Sang and conjured golden goblets
Foaming with the beer of barley;
Sang he many well-filled vessels,
Bowls of honey-drink abundant,
Sweetest butter, toothsome biscuit,
Bacon, fish, and veal, and venison,
All the dainties of the Northland,
Wherewithal to still his hunger.

The famed fantasy writer J.R.R. Tolkien was so smitten by the Kalevala as a young man in 1911, he attempted to read it in the original Finnish. He called the Kalevala a collection of “wild” and “uncivilized and primitive tales.” He borrowed many stories from it for his mythical work called the Silmarillion, and he patterned his self-created Elvish language from modern Finnish language spoken and written today.

As a longtime Tolkien fan, perhaps it is just normal that I also am drawn to this tale, as I am to most folk stories from around the world.

I also am drawn to my Finnish ancestry because of the land’s harshness and how its weather and landscape shaped the character of today’s modern Finland.

Finnish relatives of author Rudy Owens

It is a country that repelled a brutal and unprovoked invasion by the USSR and dictator Josef Stalin in 1939 and early 1940 called the Winter War. Historically, it is one of the few lands in northern Europe that also repelled Viking incursions, when nearly every other location from Constantinople to modern-day Russia to England and mainland Europe succumbed. The normally terrifying Vikings fled due to the ferocity and tactics of the stubborn local residents.

Finns call this historic trait of defiance and stubbornness “Sisu,” which translates to never giving up.

After I found my maternal biological family in the late 1980s, they shared with me some historic photos of Finnish ancestors. They are a very tough looking bunch. Despite their rough edges, the Finns perfected the sauna. They also like coffee and Nordic skiing, as I do. Today they have perhaps one of the world’s best national health systems and national education systems, outperforming the United States in nearly all key measures.

The Finnish symbol called the Hannunvaakuna

I have often wondered if my Finnish genetic heritage played a role in my fight for my birth records that lasted nearly three decades with the state of Michigan and the discriminatory public health agency there that manages all adoptees’ vital records, the Michigan Department of Health and Human Services. I take pride that the state did everything it could to defeat me, to deny me my humanity and my ancestry, and in the end, my ancestry prevailed over a broken system.

The 2015 Finnish biathlon ski uniform, showing the Hannunvaakuna symbol and traditional Finnish colors

I recently decided that I will adopt a uniquely Finnish “brand” for some of my future communications. I have chosen the Hannunvaakuna, a symbol seen widely in Finland. It can be seen on book covers, like the one above for the Old Kalevala, in photos of stone art, and on all kinds of Finnish things. The Finnish biathlon team also slapped it on their badass team uniform in 2015 tooI have seen variations of this in Native American art, and there was no cultural connection between these parts of the world—so it has a universality to it. I am working on putting this symbol on my next hoodie.

I also am looking ahead now to planning a trip to Finland, mostly because I have long wanted to visit one of my ancestral homes. I will probably look like many people there, because genetically I am connected to the people who call it home.